'Glee'. Fuck it.

Every time I watch even a clip from 'Glee' when they do a song I think I might like, I just feel very uncomfortable about how awkward the performances are. Aside from the acting being bad, the script holding a lot of secret grudges against its characters, and it being a musical, ‘Glee’s crutch is the poorly dubbed and misguided ‘whitening’ of pop songs. I confess that I have seen only the pilot and a few clips from the show, but more than a handful of times I have seen their songs posted online and been intrigued. Unfortunately the most recent video I saw was Gweneth Paltrow, a talented actress, performing the radio friendly version of Cee-Lo’s “Forget You”. About 5 beats into the song, the hair on my neck stood up because of how damned awkward the performance is. It is a trend that I have seen in the shows clips.

I should say that I do not enjoy musicals as a whole (other than Gene Kelly) and feel that the songs just serve to extend a weak story’s run time. ‘Glee’ suffers from this because without the songs, it would be just another CW show that would get cancelled after a season without anyone noticing. Ryan Murphy, the shows creator, has done some good things (Nip/Tuck, Running with Scissors, Popular) but seems to have realized that people like white kids singing soulless versions of radio hits. It is smart on his part to sellout, but damn…Gweneth Paltrow singing a shitty version of “Fuck You” on a network TV show makes me sad. Unless Cee-Lo spent his ‘Glee’ check on something awesome, like a lifesize ice sculpture of himself. Or Curt Schilling’s bloody sock. Or a brothel in Vegas. How much do you get for selling a song to TV? Enough to buy a 17th century bathtub filled with French butter to spread on diamond crusted sourgdough? I like how anytime I try to make a rational argument on this site, I wind up letting my guard down and just typing what I’m actually thinking. To get back to my point, I do not like ‘Glee’, I don’t like it’s songs and I don’t think I’ll ever watch another clip unless they either have the girl who fills their racial minority and fat/unattractive quota sing Al Jolson or one of the pretty white people (everyone else on the show but that asian girl? And a black cheerleader.) do…actually no, fuck it, no way am I going to watch ‘Glee’. It isn’t my shit and I am going to stop trying to understand why people watch a show that so obviously tries to show love to everyone. Can’t they say fuck you to anyone? Not on network TV.